Just Wondering...

The extent of human pride never ceases to amaze me. I am always astounded when parents do things that could be harmful or fatal to their children and when someone tries to tell them that they say "don't judge me! I'm a good mom! Just because I don't do things the way you do them doesn't mean I'm wrong and you're right!" Um, yikes!!!!!! Okay, Here are some things that I have heard on my moms message board (I've thrown a few real life things from friends too...)

"I have a two week old and I feed her solids to make her sleep through the night. It's totally fine!"

"Sometimes I just didn't want to mess with the car seat so I just rode with my son in the Baby Bjorn."

"I put my newborn to sleep on her tummy. It doesn't cause SIDS. Those scientist people don't really know anything about what prevents SIDS. Back-to-Sleep is a marketing campaign."

"I just let my son cry it out in his crib. Sometimes he cries for an hour. Once he cried so hard he threw up, but he has to learn how to 'self-soothe'."

"I turned my 5 month old forward facing in her car seat. She didn't like being rear facing."

"If I tighten the car seat straps as tight as they should be they will be too tight for my son so I just leave them loose. It's no big deal."

There are so many more I can't even remember them all! Oh my gosh!!!! How are people living with themselves? I get it, some things are a personal decision like the decision to use controlled crying or not, or the decision to co-sleep or not. But there are things you can do that can put your child into harms way. Believe it or not, all the mothers who said these things got angry when people on the message board tried to correct them!!!! They spouted off crap like "It's my decision as a mother!" and "Don't judge me! I'm a good mom!" Sorry ladies. Mothers who turn their 5 month olds forward facing, let their baby scream until he throws up, ride around in the car with their baby in the Bjorn, disregard medical advice not to feed solids until at least 4 months for the sake of a good night's sleep, and don't properly restrain their babies in their car seats are NOT good mothers. Believe me, I hate it too when Derek cries when I tighten the car seat straps, but I know that's because he doesn't like to be restrained not because they are too tight. I too can't stand it when Derek is calling for me in the car and he can't see me because he is rear facing. Sometimes I want to scream when Derek wakes up in the middle of the night wanting to eat (although he's to the age where he doesn't do that too much anymore.). I get frustrated when he wakes up as soon as I put him in the crib and I have to stand and pat him until he nods off. I HATE toting his infant carrier around because he is soooooo heavy in it now. I am at the same place all these other mothers are/were but the difference is that I recognize that we do those things for the safety and good of our children. Most people recognize that we should do those things for our children's safety and health. I wish that mothers wouldn't get so defensive. I understand that being a mom is a competitive scene. I recognize that there are people out there who are ridiculously judgmental about things that are your personal decision. I had an incident a few months ago where a woman scolded me in the mall for bottle feeding instead of breast feeding. It's people like that who make moms overly sensitive to critiscm. But sometimes we need to lay aside our pride and realize that there is such a thing as contructive critiscm and be willing to consider the good of our children above our own convenience.